crumbled and rolled

in which i opine about the internet, on the internet. again. 02/16/2011

Filed under: blog posts... of interest! — paperslightertext @ 6:04 pm

It’s terribly frightening, being alone with one’s thoughts.

The internet gives us refuge from that. Solitude and contemplation.

It is 55 degrees outside, and damnit, I am going out there soon, even if the world has nothing offer to me. Even if life ends like this, alone in the suburbs, alone at the mall, at least it won’t be alone in front of a screen, talking to an invisible audience, or passively absorbing content.

The Wad failed to understand my internet malaise. My youth, my adolescence, my coming of age, this niche into which my particular age group fits: we were the guinea pigs. We continue to be. While the empire crumbles from under us, we continue to buy into the illusion of affluence. THAT is depressing. Yes, Eva is depressing! Lain is fucking depressing! I fucking sobbed- like when I read 1984. My adolescence was saturated with dystopian fiction, some of it eerily prophetic. There I was, isolated in the social ghetto of unattractive female nerddom, writing fanfiction. I bonded with other adolescent nerds online. All these things have fostered in me an unfortunate habit of pouring myself out into the internet. In other words, I lack a filter. (This is a tendency in my personal life.)

But even that phrase seems to have lost its meaning, for the personal has become digital. (Yeah, copyright me, you’ll see it on an LED tshirt for thirty bucks somewhere once I sell that gem.)


ELOQUENCE, ELLLol. 01/14/2010

Filed under: blog posts... of interest!,silliness — paperslightertext @ 2:31 am

your response, which i do not want to read, always accompanied after a righteous storm of texting, that deep anxiety in the pit of the stomach that their response could be more hateful than my own vituperation. (YEAh, pull out your FUCKING thesaurus. or your google, or ‘titter’ or whatever the shit you kids use these days.) such a petty habit. to pick fights and abandon them. i blame… the internet. i blame anyone but me.

man, i’ma eat some fuckin icecream, fuck dat shit.


watch a tedtalk. 01/04/2010

Filed under: blog posts... of interest! — paperslightertext @ 11:48 pm
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if you don’t already know about TEDtalks, you need to get yourself to immediately. your brain will thank you.

here, to make it easier, here is a link to an especially accessible (and relatively short) one about metaphor! as you may surmise that is a subject right up my alley!

or, if you have about fifteen minutes, watch this amazing one about lexicography by erin mckean, who explains that the internet is made of “words and enthusiasm.” agreed, erin mckean! i want to be you when i grow up.

better living through expanding language and metaphor! hell yeah.


poetry, utopia, & procedural generation. 12/13/2009

Filed under: blog posts... of interest!,readable — paperslightertext @ 5:40 am

for me poetry is a blissful kind of entropy-producing never ending equation (procedural generation, cellular automata) whose solution becomes its variable. a strange loop a la douglas hofstadter, if you will.

to create effective analogies and metaphors- to be skilled at using language efficiently, in the way that it cooperates best with its evolutionary purpose, as a social advancement/advantage- in my opinion, that is the essence of poetry. creating fresh, efficient metaphors which recall vivid sensory details and dynamic details like the ones constructing the seamless narrative of our every day reality. (and breaking as many rules as possible along the way, because when was progress ever made by obedience?)

why is poetry considered so useless? i would plant the seed: that a society that loathes poetry, that loathes any frivolous anti-utilitarian activity like fun (or other such emotions) is a society that loathes human beings. and a society that loathes human beings is terminally ill. one that has forgone the whimsy and magic of learning- the orgasmic ecstasy of the expansion of our brains into new territory- in other words, one sickened by the poisonous trash produced by hate-mongering mass marketers- is easily susceptible to apathy, and therefore advertisements. hence the decay of our souls, the boundless suffering of earth’s advanced terminal illness that is late stage corporate capitalism: destroying our attention spans, encouraging us to hate the Other, to hate difference, to value poisonous mass-produced products (or artifically engineered illusions of ‘lifestyles’) over the relationships in our lives… what a tragedy! no wonder everyone is miserable. we have no idea how to listen to each other. we have no idea how to form new metaphors with the tired old tropes of our vapid American culture. we are so saturated with overstimulation that we have forgotten how to imagine-

that is why i believe we need a revolution of cannabis-smoking, pleasure-seeking idle dreamers. so, you numerous intelligent, sentient beings around me, you all have the potential for bodhisattvahood- so snap out of your fantasies about products, careers, lifestyles, marriages- dare yourself to conceive of things differently, whether you take a toke or a shroom or an x or nothing at all but love. drink in the sensory detail around you. plug that data back into the equation and see that no matter what you do or what the equation, everything is constantly being erased and rewritten…


maybe i’m not so good at this blog thing: a manifesto. 10/25/2009

Filed under: blog posts... of interest!,gender trouble,readable — paperslightertext @ 1:43 am

ok, you got me!

i’m a militant feminist trying to subvert as many men as possible against the patriarchy!

i’m a succubus who feeds on the souls of 17 year old boys!

i’m trying to lure you into a dark alley and neuter you!

or maybe i’m just a person… a highly observant to the point of being harriet the spy awkward and fumbling yet sometimes entertaining, kind of cute especially when (easily) flustered, silly, dramatic, impulsive, immature, person who gives off this intense vibe of friendly and awkward. i’m just trying to sing and i’m trying to do my own thing, bro! and not to take you down a notch or pretend i’m not ‘the ugly one!’ with a crush on every boy fucking crazy hungry for your COCK oh sorry did i interrupt your masturbation? i only wanted to get to know as many people as i can,

so i can steal a little bit of each of them, for it enriches the liver and the constitution and it engenders the artistic prequel to revolution, and i’m only flashy with the plumage and dramatic with the talk-

but no really- i’m an optimist- the more people i meet the more i’m impressed and that’s why i think we all deserve some of each other’s time and sorry that often i have a tendency to rhyme- it’s automatic these days.

and it lends me a cadence which heightens the ridiculous. and what else is there to entertain us in this town?


excuse me as i pontificate: 09/20/2009

Filed under: blog posts... of interest!,gender trouble — paperslightertext @ 3:57 am

but this quote is definitely worth me breaking my vow of poetry.

prepare for some grim statistics.

“However hard it is for any of us to accept, most rapes are perpetrated by men. Much of how rape is treated and enabled is about male behavior and what men do and don’t do. Let’s face facts: around one out of every three to four women or girls has been or will be raped or sexually assaulted in her lifetime. Based on sound data from diverse sources, around 90% of all rapes are those where the victims are female, identify as female and/or are identified by the rapist as female. Even if you don’t know it, you probably have at least one woman in your life you know and care a lot about — your mother, a grandmother or aunt, a sister, a girlfriend, a friend, a mentor – who has been or will be raped in her lifetime.”


ok, trying something different. 08/04/2009

Filed under: blog posts... of interest! — paperslightertext @ 12:55 am

here it is. the first ever non-poetic autobiographical post. blame it on the resin… “black gold.” anyhow, there actually exists, in fact has been in existence since march, a rap that samples the lost woods theme, which is amazing. it is on an album called… get ready for it…

the ocarina of rhyme.

holy shit, it is magic. i am not gonna link to it, cause this is not that kind of blog, but everyone knows how to use google now. right? if you’re not using windows 2000, it’s probably even built into your browser.

yes, i just outed myself as a zelda nerd.