one should never succumb to regret
speak softly and carry a suggestive baguette
fly high the flag of your innuendo
deceive no one you perceive their agenda,
sugar shrapnel will stick in your teeth
undead vegans would eat handfuls of raw beef
before you’d ever set foot again outside
but whatever you do, don’t stay inside,
for there’s pride to be had in the madness
of dial-at-eleven full-frontal bad-assness.
when you ain’t got nothin to hide,
show it off, it’s nothing to deride-
so commit every bald-headed sin,
for she who laughs most and last, wins.